so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
After we won that round of beer pong you attempted to swallow the winning ball whole claiming you had the mouth and jaw of a snake.
A snake? I must've been gone...
After that you got naked and hissed at people the rest of the night..
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
Randomize
