The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
Randomize
