Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
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