so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
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