I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
just found out I caught the bouquet at the wedding. I win for being the drunkest yet most functional bridesmaid.
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
How'd your Tinder date go?
Well, I met his girlfriend...
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
Randomize
