I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
Randomize
