I got so drunk I pissed the bed last night. He still likes me. He's a keeper
He is a keeper. You on the other hand are not.
I just told my parents that Capt'n Crunch does weird things to my mouth... my dad just stared at me
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
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