IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
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