Ah I wish I was there to nurse you then clean up your piss-filled water bottles
for some reason the bedside piss missed the water bottle today
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
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