I want to have your abortion
Drunkenly found an error on my bar tab last night. THANK YOU ACCOUNTING.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
Some Animals Are Total Jerks (10+ pics)
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.