Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
My dream in life is to scissor with Ellen. I don't care if I've got a dick. I'll make it work.
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
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