I want to stick my p in your. b.
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Randomize
