I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
Just got a message from a drag queen on okcupid. I cant even catfish successfully.
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
Randomize
