so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
I need a secretary to manage my drinking schedule.
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
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