How do you jack off and text at the same time?
On my iPhone they have an app for that
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
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