Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
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