Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
Totally just drove past you riding your bike. I was like damn, that looks like a cute little hipster boy, and then I realized it was you and that I'd already banged you and it kinda made my day. I hope you're well. Come over soon?
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
Randomize
