dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
Randomize
