Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
I just threw up on my dentist
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
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