That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
Randomize
