real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
Sooo, drunk me had the sense of mind to write down everything that happened last night.....I bet you thought you'd get away with what you did to my parrot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we thought you were sober enough for a movie but you took one look at emily blunt and screamed "aw this bitch?!" and passed out 30 seconds later
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
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