Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
A guy from tinder a while ago who sent me dick pics straight out the gate is a tech on my dad's hospital floor. I was wondering why he looked familiar and why he never took my dads vitals when I was in the room
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
