I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
So apparently after I spilled candle wax down the front of my pants, I went to the store, bought condoms, and passed them out to everyone at the bar.
I thought they were lying to me about the condoms, until I found the receipt in my pocket.
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
Randomize
