Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
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