i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
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