If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
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