HIV tests are more positive than that guy
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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