So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
Randomize
