Tell her she can't have a vagina
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
party gras won. party gras always wins.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
he had hair everywhere except his balls
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
I did not marry a roomba.
Randomize
