just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
he thought i was a dude.
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
Randomize
