i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
Randomize
