Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone.
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
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