life lesson learned today: sleeping pills and laxatives don't mix.
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
Randomize
