quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
Is this like a preordered booty call?
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
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