David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
My ATM looks so different sober.
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
We were drunk waiting for tacos and I gave him a handy in the back of the Uber while giving the driver relationship advice. I think I'm handling the whole grad school thing alright.
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize
