His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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