I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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