i just found a plastic monkey in my sweatshirt pocket
Umm I had a plastic mermaid in my pants......
Really
You win
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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