I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
Randomize
