dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.
You're the best wingman ever.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
Randomize
