Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
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