wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
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