Grow some girl-balls and come out already
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
Mitt romney looks like a fantastic lover (full disclorsure: im 76% vodka right now)
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
