What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
Btw, remind me to tell you about how I had to cancel my crazy wild sex plans with Will b/c my roommate came back from his trip after a day b/c Canada wouldn't let him in. Fucking cockblock.
Actually that's the whole story. You don't have to remind me.
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
Randomize
