how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
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