I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
Randomize
