How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
So I was throwing up in this fancy toilet at a party last night, when he decided it would be funny to flush it. It was a beday. I had to walk out with toilet water and regurgitated rumpleminze all over my face and shirt.
how do flat chested girls get laid?
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
Randomize