Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
Sorry for not calling you back. I got drunk and passed out on the kitchen floor. I just found my phone in the shower.
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