Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
Randomize
