I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize